When students transition to junior high and high school and begin taking classes with teachers outside the home, Moms transition, too. No longer do we decide the curriculum or set  the expectations. We relinquish that control, so our children can learn from experts passionate about their subjects.

Initially, it seems glorious. We don’t need to plan any lessons, grade any assignments, or coerce our child to meet any deadlines. We happily place that responsibility in the lap of another.

But we soon realize that the teacher is not a clone of us. "Wait a minute," we might say, "her standard is higher than we’re used to."  Or we might think: “I expected him to be more creative.”  Or “Hey, she isn’t encouraging my son enough.” Or. Or. Or.

I’ve experienced both sides: I’ve been the mom and the teacher.

Here are some of my thoughts:

       * Expect a learning curve the first month or two. It takes time to adjust to a new teacher’s expectations and style. Don’t panic. It’s okay for students to experience some hiccups as they adjust.

        *When someone else is shouldering the responsibility of teaching, you can stand on the sidelines to encourage when necessary and help when asked.

        *If an expectation is unclear, encourage your student to ask questions, communicating directly with the teacher. It is not your class; it’s your child’s.

        *When a teacher grades a paper, accept the grade. Even if it is lower than you like, it is a growing opportunity for your child.  If it needs more discussion with the teacher, allow your child to initiate the conversation.

        *Trials are part of life. When we face difficult circumstances, we can grow. Don’t rob your child of this chance to mature by stepping in prematurely or inappropriately.

        *Don’t expect teachers to encourage your child as you do. They are serving more kids than yours.

        *The class may not look exactly like you want it to look. That’s okay. It’s beneficial for your child to experience something different from what he gets at home.

        *Don’t offer excuses for your child. It’s good for her to take responsibility for her actions and choices.

        *Trust the teacher.

If you tend to be a helicopter mom who hovers over your children or a fire fighter mom who wants to rescue them from the flames of trial, recognize your tendency. Resist writing that e-mail or making that phone call. Wait. Watch. Encourage. At the end of the class, you’ll likely have a student who has adapted to another person’s style, learning despite that person’s weaknesses, stirred by his/her strengths, and prepared for the next challenge in line.

Teachers have a real temptation to resist. At least I do. With kids, I like to be on stage, in charge, needed. I want to be the one who asks all of the questions, who already knows the answers, and who initiates the assignments. I like to play school. And I kind of, sort of like to be in control. So the temptation is to insert myself into the hub of the learning circle.

Can you relate?

The problem with the teacher being at the center is that the students aren't, and they are the ones who should be.  We need to purposely get out of the way, staying on the periphery to coach and encourage, and allow students to be their own teachers.

What are some ways to do this at home, to "prepare the ground," particularly when students are in elementary school?

Be a learner.
Whether you're on an errand or an adventure, with a book or a craft project, be open to learning and growing alongside your kids. You may already have your diploma and degree(s), but you've only dipped your toe in the ocean of knowledge. Learning something new will give you empathy when you're tempted to push, and a hobby when you crave control.

The goal in teaching language arts is to improve a student's ability to listen, speak, read, and write. Tucked in the fine print are skills which include at least the following:

• Grammar
• Vocabulary
• Spelling
  

How do you ensure you cover these skills with your students?

One way is to buy a workbook, one for each skill, one for each kid, and assign pages. If they faithfully do a page or two a day in each book, they will likely advance to the next level by the end of the school year.

Advantages:

• Mom and students know exactly what is required each day.

Disadvantages:

• Boring!
• It's easy to get bogged down with the habit of filling in paperwork, forgetting that there is an ultimate goal of learning!
• Nothing is really required of the student, other than perseverance.
• Students don't take pride in their work.
• After all those pages are completed, what then? The books likely end up in the trash.

Maybe I'm biased, but those lists are painfully lopsided.

What is another approach to achieve the same goal?

How about learning the skills in context?

When my girls were little and many of their little friends were filling in their workbook pages, my girls were writing. Writing in portfolders. Writing in blank books. Writing stories. Writing journal entries. Writing. Writing. Writing.

They were also reading. Reading fiction. Reading non-fiction. Listening to me read fiction and non-fiction. Reading. Reading. Reading.

How did they learn spelling, vocabulary, and grammar? They learned these skills through reading and writing. As they read--and heard me read--quality literature, they absorbed new vocabulary, proper grammar, and correct spelling. As they wrote, they applied what they absorbed, refining their understanding on assignments in which they were personally invested. They learned early that writing is a process, that their first draft is rarely their last.

Advantages:

• Students get to think.
• Creativity can leak out in all directions.
• They have final products they can celebrate and share with others.
• They are motivated because they have a goal in view.
• Because they are able to express themselves, they realize they are a vital part of the learning process.
• The teacher can inspire a love of learning.
• Students learn how to learn.
• One assignment can serve a range of ages and abilities.
  
• Supplies are simple and inexpensive: paper, pencils, and time, although a computer does make revisions easier.

Disadvantages:

• Mom may have to think of or find ideas to spark creativity.
• If students are used to filling in pages, they may initially resist having to think and create.
• If Mom doesn't feel comfortable giving feedback, she may need a writing mentor to help her students.
  

Again, I may be biased, but I like that list better!

The moms of my girls' little friends feared a couple of things about ditching their workbooks: one was possible gaps; the other was standardized tests.

Through a methodical system, your students may be exposed to every jot and tittle of every skill, but when you isolate the skills from real life learning, do children actually know how to apply them? 

From what I have read and seen firsthand, the answer is usually no.  In my first classroom experience, my eighth graders came to me engorged from a steady diet of grammar instruction the prior year. I was happy because I could feed them something different. We could work on writing, incorporating grammar instruction as needed. What I quickly discovered was that, despite learning from an excellent teacher, not only did the kids still not understand or remember the grammar they had learned from her, they also didn't know how to write. Even in a traditional classroom setting, these kids had huge gaps.

And testing? At least in our case, my girls have always tested very high in language arts. Through consistent drafting, revising, and editing, they learned the nuts and bolts of the English language and were able to choose the best answer on the test most of the time.

I know writing is on the top or toward the top of most homeschooling moms' I'm-not-sure-I-can-do-that-well list. If that describes you, you're the one who is inspiring me to build this site post by post. I want to give you concrete writing ideas, tips, and resources to ensure you're covering the whole language arts package.

If you need a few workbooks for security, it's okay, but I encourage you to step out and give real reading and writing a whirl. Because it's fun, you may fear you're missing something, but let me assure you: you're nurturing thinkers, students who can confidently listen, speak, read, and write. With those tools, think of what your kids can accomplish!

Play with words this summer. Make a Wordle Word Cloud.  My middle daughter made one for her grandfather last year. She framed it and gave it to him for his birthday.

We are inundated with news everyday that is discouraging, even downright depressing. As Christians we believe in our heads that God is Sovereign, that "light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it" (John 1:5), that the gospel of Jesus redeems and transforms lives. But when the news continues to bombard us, we sometimes forget. Testimonies of God at work encourage our hearts and fuel our hope. Here is #5 in the series.

I "met" Ian and Larissa a year ago, through the video that Desiring God Ministries made about them. This beautiful couple paints a picture of marriage we don't often see, one that gives us a glimpse of the mystery mentioned in Ephesians 5:32. Their story baffles and encourages me. It's beautiful.

I have a friend who seemingly never stops thinking of creative teaching ideas. Seriously, she is like a vending machine. Pop in a need, and out comes a lesson, a class, or a curriculum, all creative, motivating, and unique, covering different learning styles.

Her latest contribution to homeschooling moms and their children is Vacation Workstation...a Brain Playground. The idea is simple but brilliant. All you have to do is make a workstation from file folders and set your students loose to explore nature, play math games, and read books. They keep track of their accomplishments with Bingo grids, a mini journal, and a log, taking away the headache of monitoring multiple children.

This is an excellent way to build a little structure into your kids' summer and keep their skills from rusting. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I receive nothing in return for my review, other than the pleasure of knowing others are benefiting from an excellent teacher.

When I read Ruth Culham's 6 + 1 Traits of Writing this past weekend, I noticed something new. She claims that, although it's okay to end sentences with other parts of speech, ending them with a noun makes them more powerful (201). She illustrates her premise by revising a proverb:

Hmmm, interesting.  I'll try it here, ending my sentences with a noun to see if they are more powerful.

Here I go.

When I read Ruth Culham's 6 + 1 Traits of Writing this past weekend, I noticed a new tip. She claims it is more powerful to end a sentence with a noun rather than another part of speech. She illustrates her premise by revising a proverb.

Hmmm, interesting thought.  I'll try it here, revising my sentences to ensure I end each one with a noun. 

My experiment here is too short to confirm or deny her suggestion, but one thing I can say: this would be an interesting way to get a student to rethink/restructure (i.e. revise) her sentences. Ask her to end several sentences in a paragraph with nouns and see how it changes her paragraph.

Have you seen this advice before?  Do you think about it when you write?  What have you discovered?

Seventeen months ago, my oldest daughter had surgery to repair subluxated  tendons in her right ankle. Yesterday morning she had surgery to repair subluxated tendons in her right ankle. It's really not an activity she put on her bucket list twice, but the first doctor didn't do such a good job, leaving her with more pain and less mobility.

Wouldn't it be nice to rewind time, in this case returning to December 2011 and choosing a different path, a different doctor, a different outcome?   When I survey the situation from my little plastic throne, there's no doubt I would.  In a heartbeat, I would sanitize her story, removing any and all problems. But with the next heartbeat, I realize that I would be removing those parts of her story that give it suspense and color, those parts that require her to live beyond herself, by faith in her God who is for her--and faithful. By messing with her story, I would take away months of waiting upon Him, trusting Him when the answers weren't obvious.

When I'm thinking correctly, I slip from my flimsy throne to my knees, bowing before the One who is on His eternal, immovable throne, the Author of every word of her story. He has crafted its beginning, middle, and end, the timing of every plot twist, and the resolution to each cliffhanger.

I am thankful He keeps the pen out of my hands and writes the story He wants for her. He invites me to sit back to read and enjoy it, learning from chapter to chapter to trust Him who writes the very best stories.   

I pray that the next chapter includes running and dancing on a healthy ankle. I'll see what happens when I turn the page.                                                                                      

Over the weekend, I found 6 + 1 Traits of Writing by Ruth Culham at the thrift shop.  For $2.50, I couldn't let it stay on the shelf.  This paragraph from Culham rang true for me.

When I was in school, the papers that got the highest grades held the reader at a safe arm's length.  They tended to pontificate.  I remember being told never to express  a personal opinion unless asked. And never use 'I,' which was always tough to figure out: Who else did the reader think was writing the piece if not 'I,' after all?  My assigned readings, however, were passionate, opinionated, stylistic, and fascinating. But when it came to my own writing, on went the straitjacket, and I wound up pumping out stuff that was stilted, cold, and distant.  It was boring--but it always got high marks.  Unfortunately, this tradition is still alive in many of the classrooms I visit. And more than likely, something that's boring to read was boring to write.  It will be nearly impossible to get students engaged in writing if all the excitement's been drained out of it (103).

Why is it that students are so often shoehorned into five-paragraph, formal, voiceless writing?

It's easy to teach a formula.  It's easy to grade a formula. It's easy to keep control of the process when you have a classroom of kids.

The question: why?

The answer: easy.

The result: boring!

It happened to me as a student. The result was that I thought I had to use big words and sound like something I wasn't. Stilted, cold, and distant didn't describe me as a person, but they certainly described my writing. Sadly, the habit went deep; I still fight to get out of the ditch I thought was mine.

I want to give my students something far better. I want them to be free to experiment, to create, to be themselves. I don't want to jam them into a specific style, draining the excitement out of writing; I want them to discover that they have something to say, and they can say it well with their own voice. They can be the ones writing passionate, opinionated, stylistic, and fascinating pieces.

What can we do to make writing more exciting for our students?

• Let them choose their own topics.
• Don't lock them into one format (i.e. the five-paragraph essay). Allow them to experiment with different genres.
• Give them a reason for writing that goes beyond the teacher and a grade, offering assignments and projects that captivate their attention.
• Integrate writing into everything they do rather than relegating it to worksheets.
  
• Remember that writing is a process. Editing is one part of the process; it's not the focus. It's important for published pieces to be correctly spelled, capitalized, and punctuated, but if mechanics are the primary focus during the process, a student can end up with a correct, but lifeless, paper. (That described my writing, too.)
• Look at writing you enjoy. Do any of the pieces follow the five-paragraph format?  Does every paragraph have a topic sentence?  Does every sentence have a subject and a verb? Likely not. Invite your students to look at writing they enjoy, observing it closely and imitating it.
  

It is true that you invite risk when you walk away from formulaic writing assignments, but you also welcome creativity, thinking, and passion. Instead of reading a predictable piece that you will soon forget, you will likely read one that comes from the heart, leaving a mark on yours.